“So what about a threeway, then?” Ruby asked me, right out of nowhere while we were snuggled up on the sofa watching EastEnders, her head on my lap.
Disturbing visions flashed through my head like a porno on fast-forward. “I’m not shagging another bloke,” I said. “No way. I’m totally not gay.”
Ruby narrowed her eyes and peered up at me. “Didn’t say anything about a man, did I? I was thinking about another girl. Although now you come to mention it, two blokes could be fun. Always wondered what it would be like to be spitroasted.”
The image that conjured up made my mouth water. My Ruby, all curvy and pale-skinned, speared between two tanned, muscled bodies… My dick popped up to let me know how much it enjoyed the idea. Ruby must have noticed too, what with the way it was jabbing her in the ear.
She grinned up at me. “That’s a deal, then, if Mark agrees too.”
“Mark?” What the fuck? She wanted us to shag my best mate? “No fucking way. He’s not bent either.”
Ruby gave me one of those long-suffering sighs she’s so bloody good at. “Neither of you has to be gay. You don’t have to touch each other. Just, you know, touch me instead.”
I looked down at her tits, all but bursting out of her dress. There was a lot of Ruby to touch, that was for sure. She was definitely more than a handful. In several ways, come to think of it.
But Mark, though? The very idea made my stomach go all queasy, like I’d just scoffed a vindaloo and washed it down with a gallon of that godawful homebrew Mark makes. “I dunno. I’m not sure he’d be into it.”
“Oh come on. I’ve seen the way he checks me out. Besides, when did Mark ever turn down a shag? The man’s a total slapper.”
She had a point. Mark Wainwright was of those blokes who never had to leave a club empty-handed. Birds loved him, and he loved them, although I’d never known him stick with one for longer than a couple of weeks. No, I wouldn’t have to worry about him getting all touchy feely with me, would I? He was a total ladies man. “Yeah, I suppose…”
“Great. You want to ask him, then? Or shall I text him now?”
“Now? No! God, just leave it to me, okay? I’ll talk to him at footie.”
Ruby pouted. “But that’s not till Saturday. I’m feeling horny right now.”
“I’m sure I can think of something to sort that out,” I said, grabbing the remote to switch the telly off. I tickled Ruby until the pout disappeared in a flood of giggles, then snuck a hand up her dress to play with her suspender belt. She liked to dress sexy, my Ruby, and I wasn’t complaining.
“Ty! You bastard, that fucking well stings,” she protested when I pinged the elastic against her thigh. But I soon had her moaning away, and it was a good distraction from Mark, and the way her suggestion had fucked with my head.
After Ruby had fallen fast asleep that night, I stared up at the ceiling and panicked.
Mark and I had been best mates since we were both knee high to a grasshopper, so there was no way I should have felt so bloody weird about sharing my girlfriend with him. It wasn’t like he’d ever made me think we were anything more than friends. I mean, there was that one time… but it was ages ago, and we were both fourteen-year-old virgins desperate for a shag. And besides, it was only a practice go at snogging. It wasn’t like we’d had sex or anything.
Even if we had both sprung a boner the minute we had our tongues in each other’s mouths.